MALAYSIA

We've now studied the holiday itinerary left behind by the L'Oreal son. I didn't sleep last night - all I could see was a haze of Air Asia planes and missing luggage followed by imodium and rehydration tablets. For ten days he and C from Harpenden will be whizzing from Kuala Lumpar to the orangutans and from there to Penang and from there to somewhere else with time zones flashing past like there's no tomorrow. His Dad has asked me to knock him out and wake him up when the homeward-bound plane lands at Heathrow. I have to say though that the hotels look superb and if someone could just lift me up and put me in one I'd be very happy.